insecurity will kill your blog

Two Cents Tuesday: Insecurities Will Kill Your Blog

August 31, 2010

in Editor's Corner

We talked a little while back about the things that kill blogs, and one of them was: not blogging.

Jerry Kennedy’s post today, which was the result of our linking up on seededbuzz, is about fear. He, like me, has developed blogs for people only to see them wither and die, with one of the main reasons being the feeling that the blogger just had nothing to say.

That feeling – feeling like you’ve got nothing to say or nothing to contribute – stems from insecurity.

Insecurity is a killer. It kills everything from relationships to families to entire careers.

If you’re feeling insecure in any way about who you are or how talented you are or how well you can write, you’ve got to dig deep and find some courage somewhere.

If you need to, step away from your Google Reader or Twitter or any place where you come face-to-face with someone else’s success.

Instead of looking at other people’s successes, you’ve got to start looking in the mirror and seeing your own. Carry over success from someplace else – maybe you’re a great mom, or an awesome boyfriend, or a really loyal friend. Maybe you’ve had years of success in your career and are now trying your hand at owning your own business. Wherever you have experienced success outside of blogging, find a way to reflect on that and carry those same skills over.

Whatever made you successful before will work for your blogging as well. Just figure out what it was, and do it again.

What are your thoughts on insecurity in blogging? Have you ever experienced a moment when you thought, “Who am I to start a blog? What could I possibly contribute?” If so, speak up. Others may need to hear that today!

Image Credit: Helga Webber

careycarey October 19, 2010 at 10:15 am

Okay, I am late on this. I just saw it posted @ Whoa!

I also read your post on vblogs, so I’ll comment on both. In reference to insecurity, to some degree, I believe we all face some form of insecurity, depending on the nature of the task at hand. Consequently, self expression via a blog or vblog is a slippery slope. When I first started blogging I didn’t have a purpose nor direction (still don’t), so naturally I wondered what I should talk about and who would read my musings. Well, I had to move away from that because worry and doubt (as you said) are a killer. So, over the last 18 month I’ve tried many different form of expressions, but basically, I had to write for my own pleasure and then let the chips fall where they may. Sure, there are hot topics that always receive comments, and there are various ways to increase blog flow (hits), but for me, I have to enjoy the topics (care about them) or I feel like I am pimping myself.

In reference to videos on a blog, or personally being in a video, well, I am standing on the fence(you’ll see). I do include links to youtube, but recently I went in front of the camera. It was the week in which the Eddie Long story broke. I had an opinion but I decided to do something a little different. I did my thing on the wings of humor. To my surprise, I received over 8,000 hits in 1 week. Let me tell you, 8,000 hits had been my total (for a few months)prior to the posting. Now of course everyone didn’t agree with my approach (OH NO!) but I had a great time doing them. I made 3 of them.

HERE: http://careycarey-carrymehome.blogspot.com/2010/09/eddie-long-interview.html

Nath @ Ipod 4 Touch September 22, 2010 at 9:51 am

a blogger must have a little knowledge about what he is blogging about , and be helpful , comment in other blogs and forums , be helpful , and people will follow him back , hence bringing him more traffic …

Chintan Kotadia September 7, 2010 at 6:24 am

Hi Tia,

Nice article and sounds interesting.
I really loved your two points

- Insecurity is a killer. It kills everything from relationships to families to entire careers. (Exceptional Motivation)
- Whatever made you successful before will work for your blogging as well. Just figure out what it was, and do it again.

Abhishek-seekersfind.com September 4, 2010 at 9:36 am

Hi Tia
This is completely true and I agree with it.

Thanks For Sharing
-Abhishek

Melinda@ Finding The Humor September 3, 2010 at 8:04 am

I have two blogs. One I have too much to say, and the other one I had to learn to get over the perfectionist roadblock and just write. The funny thing is the posts that I hesitated to hit “Publish” on because I thought..this isn’t any good, tend to be the ones that get the most attention. Go figure.

Jamie September 2, 2010 at 1:53 am

I totally agree… Put it in perspective. Don’t be insecure. If you think it is..then it is, if not then it is not. Swimwear

Jessy September 1, 2010 at 1:39 pm

I have this happen to me from time to time. I have to take a long break and go on vacation and not think about work. It helps me to clear my head and when I get back, not only am I able to write better, I have more to share with the world.

Keith Davis@Public Speaking and Presentations September 1, 2010 at 9:56 am

Hi Tia
Whenever I think of insecurity I always think of Woody Allen talking about getting into a lift in New York. The lift was a speaking lift and it greeted you as you got in.
He says that when he got out and started to walk down the corridor… he heard the lift snigger.

Guess most bloggers occasionally think that they hear that lift snigger, but we keep on blogging.

Thanks for the reminder Tia.

Tom Kinsolving September 1, 2010 at 2:37 am

Tia–
Good hear back from you. Thanks for your comment.
Yes, I do have two blogs, the one cited above (“Incandescent Planet”) getting all my attention, while the other one, dealing with Jonestown and cults, has been getting neglected (last time I posted was last February….shame!)
So, what I’d like to do is see how I could generate income somehow. I noticed there’s one site that says they pay, called “The Written Blog” I think. If you know anything about it or some other sites, please do let me know.
Thanks!
Tom

Evelyn August 31, 2010 at 5:31 pm

Hi Tia,
I think I’ll always have blogging insecurities. If I don’t have a little insecurities, then I will think something is wrong. But it doesn’t stop me from blogging. I am finding the more I blog the better I get and the more confident I become.

Yes, I have asked myself many times, “What do I possibly have to contribute?” But again, I just kick the self-doubt and insecurity in the butt and keep on moving. ;)

Great post, Tia!

P.S. I just got connected on seededbuzz and trying to learn the ropes. I think I will like it! Thanks again for sharing seededbuzz

Tia Peterson August 31, 2010 at 10:37 pm

Oh, you have lots to contribute, Evelyn. You’re an expert in a certain niche. That right there puts you above many who don’t have as much knowledge in a certain area and are just getting there or trying to get there.

Thanks for your encouraging words and your spirit! No doubt your confidence level is rising and I have seen your blog grow so much in just the short time we’ve been connected! Congrats.

Best,
Tia

JamestheJust on Elance August 31, 2010 at 4:44 pm

I was going to comment…but who am I to comment? Who would care what I had to say?…

Tia Peterson August 31, 2010 at 5:01 pm

Very funny James. :-P

Sherryl Perry August 31, 2010 at 1:23 pm

I don’t know if it’s insecurity but (like Tom) I get slowed down by perfectionism. I want to make sure that my articles are grammatically correct and factual. I suspect I’m worried that someone will take fault with my posts and I end up taking longer to write them than I should. What has been helping me is to not over-think my posts by writing a draft whenever an idea strikes me. Those posts seem to be less intensive to write. I think anyone who is thinking about blogging shouldn’t dwell on being perfect. We just all need to find the right audience for our topic and our writing style

Tia Peterson August 31, 2010 at 10:34 pm

Good idea about drafting. I keep a notebook and tonight I went through and just blasted off 5 guest post ideas complete with outlines! You’re right that it makes things much less intensive and writing from the gut is often rewarded. The posts that take me the most time to plan are often the least viewed and least commented/shared, and that just annoys me. :) lol

Dandy R. Reiner August 31, 2010 at 12:49 pm

You really spoke to me in this post. I have been concidering writing my own blog for a few months now. I know exactly what I would like to do and have even already written what would be really great posts, but insecurity holds me back. There are so many wonderful, well written, informative blogs out there and I think what would be the point for me to join in. Why would anyone care what I have to say? Thanks for reminding me that I do have a unique voice. You’ve reminded me that no one has my exact life experiences, but if I can relate to others perhaps they can relate to me. I think you may have given me the push I need. Thanks!!

Tia Peterson August 31, 2010 at 10:32 pm

Dandy – AWESOME!!! This comment is the kind that we look forward to. I want to help, and I’m glad that I have in some small way. I really hope to see you out there blogging soon!

T. August 31, 2010 at 11:35 am

Insecurity kept me from writing for many, many years. I studied English Lit and Creative Writiing in college because I loved it but once I graduated and entered the working world I put aside my writing in favor of earning a more stable living. I would go back to writing ever once in a while – trying my hand at fiction, poetry but I could never get my groove back. After being laid off not once, but twice I decided to do something for myself, to cheer myself up and maybe share my experience with other folks so I started a blog. At first, it was all about the personal essay and finding myself while being out of work but eventually became what it is today…sort of eclectic literary/essay…..ok – it is what it is – lol – my point is that you have to decide to do something for yourself – if it turns out you’re a literary genius…freakin yay for you. If it turns out you’re just joe schmo writer….yay for you too! If you love it….do it – you will not regret it.

Tia Peterson August 31, 2010 at 10:30 pm

Thanks, T!

I’m glad you found a way to still make writing a big focus by blogging. I’m getting ready to do a big post on that and maybe I’ll use you as an example. I was a tech writing major, so I can somewhat relate. In fact, I chose technical writing simply because I thought it would be more marketable! Turns out that it is marketable, but I found a way to make it work for me in terms of blogging and blog development.

Anyway, I’m digressing. Thanks for your comment. I like that you were able to work out your insecurity by just becoming comfortable with what you love to do. I hope it loves you back!

Cheers,
Tia

Kissie August 31, 2010 at 10:26 am

You pinned it. I couldn’t describe it when I was suffering from it or maybe I just didn’t want to. I got over the insecurities by being Just Kissie. ;-)

Don’t compare.
Don’t compete.
Don’t complain.

Thanks, Tia!

Tia Peterson August 31, 2010 at 10:28 pm

Love it! It’s worth repeating:

Don’t compare.
Don’t compete.
Don’t complain.

Best comment ever. Thanks, Kissie.

Kathy August 31, 2010 at 8:38 am

People need to realize that deep down we are all human. On that level we all have faults including the people who are ultra-successful. There really is no reason to be insecure as long as you are talking about things that you know something about.

Tia Peterson August 31, 2010 at 10:27 pm

Hey Kathy – I agree. I think people begin questioning whether or not they really do know something, and that’s where the issue lies. A big help in that situation is to turn off the noise. Sometimes Twitter and other tools we have can be stumbling block. And you’re right, we’re all only human. None of us have any super-powers that I am aware of!

Jean Sarauer August 31, 2010 at 8:35 am

I think anyone who writes, whether as a blogger or otherwise, feels a sense of insecurity at times. And, comparing ourselves to anyone else–even to our previous work sometimes–can be a killer. For me, the only thing that keeps my confidence high is to write for the love of it. When I focus on that, everything turns out okay. It doesn’t mean everything I write turns out okay–some of that is pure rubbish, but I accept it’s part of the process rather than allowing it to fuel insecurity.

Tia Peterson August 31, 2010 at 10:25 pm

Hey Jean – Thanks for your comment. And it’s a perfect one to link the 21 Essential Life Lessons to.

You’re right that comparing ourselves even to our past work can be detrimental. I think comparison, when not done properly, is a huge contributor to insecurity.

Tom Kinsolving August 31, 2010 at 8:32 am

I have two blogs, Tia. My big issue is NOT the feeling I don’t have enough to write about–I have tooooo much!–but rather the perfectionism that slows down my output. You know, so many, many ways to cook up that dish, e.g., layout, pics, connections, style, etc., etc.
It’s getting in the swing of just “doin’ it,” and not feeling like it has to always be such a major production. Some regular steady streams of posts is the lifeblood of the blog, but they don’t HAVE TO ALWAAAAYS be biggies, just quality.
It’s overcoming that compulsion that is key. Wouldn’t you agree?

Tia Peterson August 31, 2010 at 7:02 pm

Hey Tom, welcome to the blog!

You’re on the right track! I don’t have an issue with perfectionism but I completely understand it (I think I have overcome that issue over time). It can definitely impact blogging success. Are you blogging at the moment?

Wayne Howard August 31, 2010 at 7:34 am

A lot of my friends have this issue when I talk to them about blogging. They either say they are not a good writer or that they would not have anything to talk about. I try to say that everyone can be a blogger! Just find what you are a passionate about and go from there.

Myself? Haven’t really had the problem. I don’t write sometimes because I just don’t want to LOL. I’m on vacation. :P

Tia Peterson August 31, 2010 at 6:59 pm

Hey Wayne, I think it’s VERY common, especially among people who desperately want to, because it could help their businesses (like coaches and consultants) but get paranoid, or who spend so much time thinking of what to say that they never say anything at all!

{ 12 trackbacks }

Previous post:

Next post: